Gift of Words!

I celebrated my 47th birthday this week. We always get together as a family for each family member's birthday throughout the year. We have several traditions associated with our birthday parties. Usually, I cook the birthday person's favorite meal. Then, we always have a Baskin Robbins Mint Chocolate Chip Ice Cream cake. Along with a few other things, we participate in a tradition we call "Gift of Words." This is my favorite tradition of our birthday celebrations.

During this tradition, each family member takes a moment to share something with the birthday girl or boy--something they love about that person or something special about the person or maybe something special that they shared with that person during the year. It is always the highlight of our parties and is the greatest gift we receive on our birthday.

This year, my children got a bit emotional during our time and we cried many happy tears. I am so glad we have incorporated these "Gift of Words" ceremonies into our family celebrations. As I reflected on the things said to me by my family, I was surprised by the great way my family can articulate their feelings. Even my three-year-old grandson was clear in his expression of gratitude for "taking good care of him." Everyone shared different things from deep in their heart and soul. I was proud of them and assured them they are truly easy to love and take care of!

1 Thessalonians 5:11 says; "...encourage one another and build eachother up..." In certain translations of the Bible, the word "edify" is used in the place of "build eachother up." The word edify means; "build-up, establish, uplift, enlighten, and inform." I am always very careful to actively listen as my family informs me of what I have been communicating to them with my actions each year. This is a great way for me to be uplifted and also to understand what is important to them. For example, my youngest daughter said I always "make her feel at home even when she is gone away at college." Well, this comment really blessed my soul. I had prayed about what I could offer her when she went away to college. I set a goal to "be present in her life." So in this "Gift of Words" she confirmed I had heard from the Lord about what she needed and I had done a good job completing the goal.

Sometimes I feel it is so much more likely in our culture to communicate things that are going wrong and need to be changed in a person's life. I try to spend my days noticing the precious qualities I see in people and following through on sharing it with them. God has created people so differently and with so many qualities that are "in the image of God." It blesses Jesus when we rejoice in the people He has created.

I think this "Gift of Words" ceremony over the years has helped me (and my family members) to be more expressive about my feelings to those around me. I try to make sure I do not hold back any positive thoughts I am feeling about people. When I have an endearing thought or encouragement for someone, I blurt it out before I have time to analyze whether it is "worthy" to be said or not. Of course I should say it! If it is sincere and heartfelt then what am I waiting for?

So, go give someone a "Gift of Words" today! You will be building them up, establishing them, uplifting them, enlightening them, and informing them! Trust me, they need to be encouraged and we need to be free to share the loving thoughts that enter our hearts!

Celebrate Life!

Last Friday, I went to a "Celebration of Life" service at a local church. The woman who had passed away was the mother of one of my youngest daughter's closest friends. I had met this woman a few times, but did not have the opportunity to know her. As I listened, I found out what was important to her and what her life had meant to so many people! She was an amazing woman! Although her life was shorter than some, she had made a huge impact on all those around her. She was 55 when she went home to be with the Lord.

As I have gotten older, I have been to many services to honor and say good-bye to those who have passed away. It is a reminder to me that my time will come. I rest in knowing God says in Psalm 139:16; "...All of the days ordained for me were written in Your book before one of them came to be." God knows all of my days on this earth. He has had them written in His book before I was even born. He has everything under control. He knows! And because He knows, I don't need to know! I can rest and trust Him to lead me each day!

But, what I do know is that we are all facing death. It is in the cards for all of us. And no one knows when it will come. Today, tomorrow or in 40 years. I believe it is a benefit to me to be mindful of the known fact of death and the unknown fact of when it will come in my life. This mindfulness has lead me to live out as many moments as I can in a present and intentional way. What I mean is even as I look forward to Christmas, I try to make sure I do not overlook the moments until then. Sometimes I feel we can look forward to something so much, we can accidentally wish away the days in between. This is something that I did when I was younger, but wisdom has stopped me from doing this today. Each moment is a precious blessing with the opportunity to make a huge difference!

As I reflect on the words spoken about this woman whom I did not know, I believe she lived a very successful life. I come to this conclusion because of the following testimonies from her family and friends. She laughed a lot! She loved deeply! She enjoyed people and the beautiful things God has given us in this world. She expressed her feelings without leaving unknowns! She gave her blessing to her children! She lived with conviction! She helped many people! She lived with great meaning! She used her creative energy! She did what only she could do! Most of all, she knew Jesus in this life and she is with Him now in eternity!

As I celebrate the birth and life of Jesus in this Christmas season, I will celebrate each moment! And I will give those that love me the gift of living each of my days here to the fullest! Loving, blessing, rejoicing, expressing, enjoying, making memories! Then, when it is time for me to go home, those I love will have every reason to celebrate my life! For my life will have been a testimony to the joy of Jesus and the life after that awaits in eternity! Celebrate life!

Don't Wait for Tomorrow!

I had lunch with a friend this week. I met her at Hope Cottage which is a homeless shelter I volunteer at. When I met her, she had been homeless for many years. She was defeated in life and hiding from herself and everyone else too. God gave me a great love for this woman! He reminded me to pray for her all the time! I knew from the day I met her, she had significant meaning in my life. So I followed the Lord in our relationship. I have known her for about 3 years now. She is a close friend.

At lunch she said something that has struck me. She said, "I feel like, it is my time now!" When I heard her I rejoiced out loud in the restaurant. (Not too loud.) This blessed me so much. I remember a time when my friend was barely living and always waiting for tomorrow. These words expressed the victory of Jesus in her heart and soul! So we rejoiced together.

When I met this friend, she did not know Jesus. She had no idea how much God loved her. She had no idea how valuable she was to the people around her and to God Himself. She did not understand she was created with a purpose and that the Lord had given her clues in her DNA about what that purpose was. For many years, she was ignoring the desires within herself to be who God created her to be. In essence, she was in a perpetual state of waiting instead of taking action toward the meaning of her creation.

Many people ask me day after day, "How do I know what my purpose is?" I have spent much of my life searching for this answer. I believe that on most days, I do function in the purpose for which God has created me. How did I figure it out? I searched within for what God put it me from the beginning and then I ventured out to practice and experiment and try to follow the directional arrows the Lord placed before me. I walked through the open doors He put in front of me even if I felt some fear. I did all this as I was bathing my life with the Word of God, the presence of God, and I did it with a willing heart. I realized that His plan for my life was better than mine and my ultimate satisfaction comes from fulfilling my God given purpose.

I have been listening to a song the last few days that has caused me to dance and sing in my car and in my kitchen and through my life in general! It is called, "Why am I waiting for tomorrow?" by Mandisa. Here are a few of the lyrics;

I can't live my whole life wasting
All the grace that I know You've given
'Cause You made me for so much more than
Sitting on the sidelines

I don't wanna look back and wonder
If good enough could have been better
Every day's a day borrowed
So why am I waiting for tomorrow?
Why am I waiting for tomorrow?


It has been a pleasure watching my friend over the last three years go from homelessness and hopelessness to renting a room and having a future filled with hope. She is 58 years old and now registered to take classes at our local community college. This has been a dream of hers since she can remember. She has always loved to learned but has been waiting for years and years for the right time. I am glad that she expressed, "Now is my time!" I believe that now is your time too. So whatever you have been waiting for, whatever is in your heart and DNA, whatever your dreams and hopes; don't wait for tomorrow! It does not matter if you are old or young or somewhere in the middle. Now is your time! God has created you for "such a time as this."

There Is Pain!

I have a guitar. It is a very useful tool in my life. It helps me get to a place of acceptance when my pain level is rising and I am feeling overwhelmed. I have never taken a guitar lesson. I don't really play guitar. But when my soul is in anguish and I need to express my feelings, I get out my guitar and start strumming.

Well, tonight was one of those nights. In the last few days, several things have been weighing heavy on my heart. I have been over-eating, over-thinking, and filling my time with activity to avoid pain. Where pain is concerned, I would rather go anywhere else.

The truth is we live in a broken world! Things are not right all over the place. I live with regrets over bad decisions I have made and the consequences! Then, there are the choices other people have made which have deeply hurt me. There are circumstances I wish I could change in my life and the lives of those around me. Things I wish I could fix that I cannot!

As I was reflecting on this in my prayer time, I was reminded of a verse in Revelation 21:4. In this verse God promises he will wipe away all of our tears. In a description of heaven, He says; "There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain." In this promise, I realized something. Although He is promising no pain in heaven we can be sure there WILL be pain here.

This truth extends to my attempts to defer pain and suffering for those I love by making sacrifices for them. What I've learned is that no matter how sacrificial I am, I still can't stop pain from coming their way. My efforts are futile! The only answer is for me to learn to live with these realities.

Personally, I try to stick with God on everything and make right decisions. Even in these efforts to please God, I know He did not intend for me to live a painless existence while I am on earth. Pain is part of the journey. It is comforting to know that when I get overwhelmed with pain, God has given me a way to deal with the build-up of emotions. A long hard cry!

So, that is what I did. I got out my guitar and quieted my soul. I gave myself the space to feel the pain. I stopped running! Stopped eating! Stopped thinking! I stopped trying to fix everything! And I cried! I told the Lord through my tears what was burdening my heart! And He listened! Jesus said in Matthew 5:4; "Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted." Mourning over the brokenness in this world and in my own life is healthy. And Jesus is there to comfort me!

I can't say my heart is completely healed! It still hurts! But, I did relieve some pressure with my tears! I have entered into an exhausted state that comes after crying. It is much more peaceful! It is kind of a "giving up" in a healthy sort of way. I have given up striving and surrendered to the fact of pain in my life and in the lives of those that I love. I have received comfort from the Lord as I spent some time mourning over sin! One day, I will be in a place where pain will not exist! Until then, I will surrender to the truth! There is pain!

My Strength Lost Control!

The other morning, I was walking through my bathroom and noticed my pull-up bar. Due to a car accident this summer, pull-ups have been off limits for me per my physical therapist. There is something very satisfying to me about the strenuous nature of pull-ups; however, I had been resisting the temptation.

But in this moment, as I looked at the bar, I felt the urge to flex my muscles. It was an impulse and I knew it was probably not a good idea. So, before I came to my senses,I quickly took action. I grabbed the bar and began to pull. When I was almost to the top with my body slightly slanted in front of the bar, something shocking happened. The bar dislodged and at the speed of gravity (9.8 meters per second squared), I fell flat on my back. (Seriously, I thought things like this only happened in sitcoms!) Luckily, my back and my bottom took the brunt of the fall, and my head did not hit.

Normally, when I do pull-ups, I check the bar and tighten it to make sure it will hold me. In the rush of doing something I shouldn't have been doing, I did not take this precaution. Bottom line was, my strength had lost control (read on and this will make sense)! Just because I can do a pull-up, does not mean I should. This lesson applies to many areas of my life.

As I have reflected on this foolish act, I was reminded of the list of the fruit of the spirit in Galatians 5:22-23. From an apple tree comes apples. From the Spirit of God living in me comes a list of "fruits" which includes; love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness (meekness), and self-control. In this action, I definitely was not seeing patience, meekness/gentleness or self-control exhibited. Meekness means, "restraint coupled with strength and courage" or "strength under control." Meekness or gentleness deals with the ability to hold back strength in an instance when you could use it.

A great bible story that shows an example of meekness is found in 1 Samuel 24. King Saul, who was the king of Israel, was hunting David for years. David was living a lifestyle of running and hiding from King Saul. One day while King Saul was looking for David to kill him, he decided to go into a cave to use the restroom. (There were no port-a-potties back then.) Well, David and his men happened to be hiding in that same cave. Saul was in a very vulnerable position. It would have been easy for David to kill him and relieve his life of this predator. But, instead of killing him, David cut off the corner of King Saul's robe. This was a true act of restrained strength and courage. Later, he showed the corner of the robe to King Saul to prove he was not planning to harm him. I can learn a lot from this great act of meekness. This was true strength!!

This incident in my life has given me an incentive to practice deferring my strength in some situations. I don't have to hit every kill shot in the racquetball game! I don't have to win every argument! I don't have to be the one to answer every question when I know the answer! I don't have to run up and jump over every rock I see! This is a discipline that requires much more strength than just letting myself act impulsively and out of control. My strengths can be considered a weakness without His strength in control!

I am counting on the strength of the Holy Spirit together with my cooperation to help me have fewer moments where I land flat on my back! I love the way God can take a situation and help me to draw out practical application for my life. It is great to know He is WITH me and there to pick me up when I fall!

Accept the truth! Don't take the bait!

Recently, I spent some time with a person. A person who I want to care about me and my life. In our conversations, I kept trying to tell her what I was doing and how I was feeling and the feedback I was receiving clearly indicated that she does not care. When our time together was over, I felt empty and deeply hurt. My mind was racing and I was not thinking clearly. I was in a fog! I have spent the last several days processing this situation and I am hoping it will help someone else!

Now this is not the first time I have experienced this disappointment and discouragement after spending time with this person. So I have been trying to develop a plan that will relieve me from getting my heart broken over and over again. I know from the Lord that leaving this relationship would not be His will. I am a very important part of this person's life and she looks forward to our times together. I don't think she is aware of her lack of care and telling her would just lead to guilty feelings. She is under a lot of stress and lives in difficult circumstances. So confrontation or leaving the situation behind are not options.

In processing this information, a close friend and very wise woman gave me a good visual. She helped me to see this problem as a "hook." So the hook is the fact that she does not care and I get caught because of my unwillingness to believe this fact. Each time I am away from this person, I fantasize that she cares! So I go into the circumstance looking for the care I so desperately want. This is like a fish looking at a piece of bait on a hook. He is looking for food to nourish him, but he is staring at bait which will destroy him. If he goes after it, thinking it is food and something he needs for survival, then he gets hooked. If the fish were full and not in need of the food, maybe he would see more clearly and not take the bait.

So here is the plan. First of all, no more fantasizing that this person cares. The truth: she does not care. In Hebrews 13:5, it says; "...be content with what you have, because God has said, 'Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.'" This truth is much more important than the hook I was letting get imbedded in my soul. God cares! He shows me His love and care each day! He has sent many people into my life to love and care for me. One way I will prepare for the next time I see this uncaring person is to plan time around that difficult visit with others who DO care. This will give me a cushion on each side of our visit. This is a way of being gentle to myself. I will go into these dangerous waters as a well-fed fish. I will be full of the caring of God and the caring of my friends so I will not take the bait and get caught by the hook.

Do you have a relationship in your life that is destructive to you? Do you want them to care, to be proud, to love you, to accept you, etc.? Are you going into it over and over without accepting the truth? It is time to look straight at the truth and accept it! And although this relationship is not the way you want it to be, you have a choice to make! Maybe it is not God's will that you stay in this relationship at all. But if leaving is not an option, you need to ask yourself some questions: Are you going to take the bait? Or are you going to take care of yourself? Look around and see all God has provided for you! God is providing what you seek from this difficult relationship in other ways! Be content with what you have! Love this person without needing anything from them! You will be safe in the arms of your Heavenly Father! He will never leave you nor forsake you! I am making the choice, I don't want to be caught in this hook again. So if you are willing, let's do it together. Accept the truth! Don't take the bait!

Your Name??

On Monday nights, I have a Bible Study in my home with a group of college age students. A few weeks ago, the Lord lead me to do a study on names. It started when we were studying Daniel 1 and I noticed the Babylonians changed the names of Daniel and his friends when they were brought into captivity. This was a plot of the enemy to steal what belonged to these men.(John 10:10) Although they were in captivity in the physical realm, Daniel and his friends did not allow the name changes to alter who they were. They chose to believe God for their identity rather than give in to the change made by the Babylonians. For example, Daniel means "God is my Judge." If you read Daniel, you will notice he lives up to his name. In all of Daniel's endeavors, he chooses to find ways to honor God. He keeps his trust in God and ultimately he acts according to God's commandments putting the judgement of God above the authority of his Babylonian captors. He knows who he is and it leads to Babylonian kings confessing that Daniel's God is the Most High God. In Daniel 2:46, King Nebuchadnezzar, who was the most powerful man in the world at that time, falls on his face before Daniel and says in verse 47; "...Surely your God is the God of gods and the Lord of kings..." It takes the power of God to cause the most powerful king in the world to bow down to his slave!

Daniel spent 70 years of his life in captivity in Babylon, but not one of his days was spent in spiritual captivity. His spirit was free as he served God. It led him into a position of leadership in the greatest nation in the world even though he was technically a slave! Daniel gained his freedom by knowing who he was and knowing who God is! God had written in the DNA of Daniel that he would be a man who would honor God as the Judge of his life. And Daniel lived up to the call and was a powerful and well rewarded man regardless of his physical captivity!

I find great freedom in knowing who I am and who God created me to be! My first name, Kim, means; "Ruler or Fortress." My middle name, Annette, means; "Gracious." So as I interpret this name, I always remember I am a "Fortress of Grace" and a "Gracious Ruler." When my mother named me, she did not know the meaning of these names, but God knew who I was and led her to give me this name that reflects my DNA and points to my calling.

I have always been a person to whom others run to find safety when the trauma of life rages.
Before I understood who I was and who God had created me to be, these situations caused me stress and serious insecurity. I would freak out when people turned to me for help, and wonder what I should do. I have never been comfortable with death or even hospitals for that matter. This is where my middle name comes in: Gracious. I depend completely on the "grace of God" to show me what to do. I could never be a fortress for anyone in their time of need without understanding my total dependance on God to provide for the person. Ultimately, I know Jesus is their fortress but He uses me to act as His gracious safety agent in tramatic situations. Now that I know these things, I respond to the calls and go into all kinds of circumstances with the peace and confidence of knowing that God intended, before the foundations of the world, to use me in this way in this generation!

Self-awareness is a great tool in living a free and effective life on earth. We need to know who we are and live in this knowledge no matter what our circumstances. I have been called lots of names in my life other than the one God has given me. Names such as useless, worthless, fearful, foolish, bossy, arrogant, and many others including some that are inappropriate to mention in writing. For years, I believed some of these names and got off course from the life God has created me for. I wasted some time going back and forth from who I knew I was to who people around me said I was. Now, I stand strong and self-assured in the revelation of Jesus and identity He has given me. His presence, power, and love in my life are all the security I need to be free and useful for His glory!

Who are you? What is written in your DNA? Who has God created you to be? What is the meaning of your name? Take the time today to find out and hold onto the truth above the lies the enemy is trying to convince you of! You are very valuable to this generation! Only you can do what you were created to do! Jesus says in John 8:31-32; ..."If you hold to my teachings, you are really my disciples. Then you shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free."

Check out the meaning of your name at the website: http://www.name-meanings.com/search.php

The Affectionate Love of Jesus

The fall season is always a hard transition for me. It is filled with scattered days of the sun and warmth of summer, and then, dreary days of the cold and harshness of the winter to come. I enjoy the colors of the fall leaves but in the back of my mind I know they are dying and will fall to the ground in a matter of weeks.

The cold weather really got to me today. So I spent some time sitting under a blanket on my couch. As the wind and the rain raged outside, I had my bible out and I was looking for some comfort and affection from Jesus! The Lord led me to a scripture I love from John 13. In verse 23 it says; "Now there was reclining on Jesus' bosom (chest) one of His disciples, whom Jesus loved." This scripture blesses me so much because of the physical closeness of Jesus to His disciple. I enjoy visualizing this intimate scene between close friends! I also love the fact that in this scripture and several others in this book, John, the author, refers to himself as "the disciple whom Jesus loved." Again in John 21:20, John writes; "Then Peter turning around, saw the disciple whom Jesus loved following, who also had leaned on His breast at the supper..." It is clear John understands he is loved by Jesus. It also seems to me it was important to him that he was able to lean against the bosom of the Lord at the last supper. Because he restates the physical affection of this scene once again in this gospel record, I believe it was a profound moment in his life. I also believe the Holy Spirit inspired him to focus on this moment because we need to be aware of the affectionate love of Jesus! Physical affection is a way Jesus communicated love to John and it is a way we communicate love to one another in this world.

It is amazing how the Lord communicates love and affection to me in so many ways in my life. He is so here WITH me! I feel so loved just like John!! One way is through providing me with parking spots. Today, I had a lunch date with a friend and was forced out from under my blanket and into the rain. I love my friend and loved our lunch together, but it was hard to get myself out in the rain. I know the rain is a blessing, but I was struggling with the cold weather pushing away the summer I have so enjoyed!! It is hard for me to let go of warm walks in the early mornings and sandals and shorts. But I made my way toward the restaurant and as I rounded the corner in the rain, I knew God felt the struggle going on in my heart. He knew I was mourning the end of the warm weather. I could feel His affectionate love coming close to me. So I looked around and said; "Lord, where is my parking spot?" At that moment, I saw a man walk out to get into his car and he opened up my spot right in front of the restaurant! This is the affectionate love of Jesus I experience over and over again. Although it was not literal, I could feel His arm around me. He understands what I am going through and He is there to light up my world. He touched me from heaven and I felt Him. At that moment, I could feel myself leaning against His chest!

When I feel the love of God poured out on me in numerous ways, day after day, I notice that it is impossible for me to hold back the affectionate love of Jesus. When I go to the homeless shelter, I hug all of the ladies! When my grandchildren are with me, I rub their heads and kiss and hug them. God has set me free to share His loving affection!! There is no need to filter it!!

So, as I say good-bye to the summer I loved, I will look forward to skiing and sledding and making hot chocolate. And cuddling by the fire with the ones I love. And especially the affectionate love of Jesus that He pours upon me no matter what the season:)

"Help Us Bless!"

My daughter works an early shift most days, which gives me an opportunity to spend the mornings with my grandsons. They are so sweet and full of the innocent wisdom children seem to be born with. As part of our morning routine, we eat breakfast and say a prayer for our food and the day. My three-year-old grandson has been listening to these prayers since he was born. His older brother, who is eight, usually leads the prayers. Recently, the three-year-old has decided he would like to lead prayers, and does a great job praying for the food. But the way he ends his prayer has captured my attention. Where the eight-year-old asks Jesus at the end to; "Bless our family," the three-year-old has transformed this phrase into; "Help our family bless!" I love this and it has become a discussion at our morning time together with the Lord.

It amazes me how children are born with an incredible understanding of things beyond their years. Yes, it is a wise thing to ask for the blessing of the Lord, but it is also a beautiful thing to ask Jesus for our family to be a blessing. I looked up the word "bless" and found this definition; "to request of God the bestowal of divine favor or to bestow good of any kind upon."

As I was teaching my grandsons about how to bless, a story came to mind. I have a friend I pray with once a week in a prayer group. We pray for all kinds of things the Lord brings to mind. This friend has made a habit of praying for the people who visit one of the Taco Bells in town and for the employees there. My friend has taken this as a responsibility and as a commission from the Lord. She goes there and prays whenever the Lord asks her to. In my opinion, this is how cities are transformed!

Well, my friend brought a prayer request before us about a week ago. She noticed, while in the Taco Bell, that the manager looked sad. So she sat her down and asked her how she could pray for her. The manager told her that her "ex" had taken her one-year-old daughter a year ago. She had not seen or heard about her daughter for one year! She wanted my friend to pray for her daughter to be returned. So, my friend prayed with her and then brought the request to the prayer group--we prayed together and continued praying individually.

This situation absolutely broke my heart, so I prayed often as I thought of the despair this situation would cause me. Sometimes, when in a public place, I have lost track of my child for a moment and begun to panic. I can't imagine the pain and terror of an entire year without my child!!

Two days after our prayer meeting, I woke up early and decided to read the paper. On the second page, I read a small article about a man being captured in Phoenix who had taken his child illegally from her mother. Then it said, to my shock, that the child had been returned to her mother in Flagstaff. The girl was two years old. At this point, I jumped out of my chair. I was sure it was the little girl and mother I had been praying for! This Wednesday, my friend confirmed it was true. In two days, God had answered these prayers.

This is an example of how we bless. We look around and see those who are hurting. And, we notice. We offer to pray for their needs with faith, knowing that Jesus is; "Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us..." Ephesians 3:20. I can't think of a better way anyone could have blessed this mother.

Sometimes we are able to bless by providing something for someone in need. If it is not possible to do this, then, asking Jesus to meet the need, however great or small, is the greatest blessing we can give!! And in the process, they receive the blessing of blessings. Seeing Jesus come alive in the world around them!!

In 2 Corinthians 1:11 it says; "...you help us by your prayers. Then many will give thanks on our behalf for the gracious favor granted us in answer to the prayers of many." So let me pray for us today this sweet, little, powerful prayer from the heart of my grandson; "Lord, help us to bless!"

Hard To Say Good-Bye!

I heard this week one of my closest childhood friends passed away. Her name was Mardelle and she was one of the bridesmaids in my wedding. This news was devastating to my heart. I loved this friend deeply and she is woven into the fabric of my childhood. If I painted a picture of my childhood she would dwell there by my side as my partner in finding adventure. She was my sounding board, my comforter, and one of my favorite teammates. I cherish my memories with her!! When we were together, life seemed endless and we seemed invincible. Now her life is over. I wish she could have stayed here with me a little longer. It is hard to say good-bye!!

One thing that has bothered me about her death is the lack of time I have had with her in the past twenty-five years. Our lives just drifted apart as we moved in different directions. We talked on the phone in the beginning. Then we emailed and recently we were reconnected through facebook. But, I counted on her being out there, living her life. I counted on hearing from her. When we communicated, it was like no time had gone by. Our souls connected like they had so many years ago.

Life is filled with different seasons. We move through them as if they will never end and then one day we are in a different season. The days gone by are over. We can't bring them back again. We can peruse them in our memories but time does not allow us to dwell there again.

In my life today, I am much more aware that opportunities for relationships are limited by time. I make sure I am making the most of my time with the people I love. When God brings a close friend into my life, I take full advantage of their available time knowing this time might not be available forever. I leave gaps in my schedule to be available for my family and close friends so I do not miss opportunities. Ephesians 5:15 says; "Be careful, then, how you live--not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity..."

I wish back when I was a teenager, I would have been more wise in how I used my time. This is one thing in my life I regret! But I am grateful for my friend. I am grateful for the time the Lord gave us together!! I truly enjoyed her! She was an expression of God's love to my life during that season so many years ago. I thank God for the way He created her and for His divine wisdom in bringing our lives together. He knows her heart and all of the intricate parts of her story. I trust her into His hands.

Still in knowing all of this, it is hard to say good-bye!

Ecclesiastes 3:1-4; "There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance,..."

"A Royal Flush"

A close friend of mine said something to me which has been resonating in my soul. What she said was brave and wise and like nothing anyone has ever said in my life. She said; "I am sorry about the things you have been through in your life. But, I am glad you have been through them. In going through those things, God has made you into the woman you are. And, I love who you are so I would not want the suffering in your life to be taken away."

In my life I have been acquainted with suffering. If God called out from heaven; "My children, would one of you be willing to please go through ______ ?," I am sure I would not have volunteered and I don't think you would have either. I am sure there are many things in your life you would not have chosen to suffer through. I believe I have come to terms with the things I have suffered. I know I have suffered more than some people and less than others. In pondering this and living life, one thing I do know is WE ALL suffer.

The Bible is clear about Jesus being a man of suffering. Isaiah says in Chapter 53, verse 3 as he is prophesying about Jesus; "He was despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows and familiar with suffering." In His life on earth, Jesus was spit upon, beaten, striped, insulted, disrespected, disbelieved, and even crucified. I think the greatest suffering might have been God coming in the form of a man, Jesus! All the power to "spread the universe with His right arm" and He held back His power to give us all a choice to believe. And many He created with His own hands, did not believe. John 11:35 says; "Jesus wept."

James 1:2-4 says; "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know the testing of your faith develops perserverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." Also, Romans 5:3-4 says; "...we rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope." Although I have come to terms with my past sufferings, I still lack in rejoicing when trials come. So, how do I help myself rejoice in the time of suffering knowing that the outcome of my sufferings have brought great things into my life?

I think about a poker game. In poker you get 5 cards. I believe when I was born, I got one ace, let's say, the ace of hearts. The rest of my hand was a mess of cards that I did not want or need. So I lived with that hand for awhile until it was my turn to discard to the dealer. I threw 4 cards back in. Now this poker game was not a game of luck, because Jesus was the dealer. He knew that if He added another good card to my original hand, I would have only discarded three cards and it would have messed up the final outcome. So those 4 cards that I thought I did not need, well, I needed them for the final outcome. In the game of life, I have been dealt a "Royal Flush", ace of hearts high. This is the highest hand in the game of poker.

God has surrounded my life with the most beautiful people! I am convinced that my family and friends are the most loving and wonderful people on the earth!! Also, I am absolutely sure at each moment, even in my worst ones, that God loves me!! I feel Him watching me, enjoying me, and sharing life with me!! This love He gives is not related to my mistakes or my great accomplishments. He is just always there, loving me!! I am appreciated and loved by friends and family for who I am and everything I have gone through!! They love me even in my imperfect and unfinished state! Each day I wake up with purpose and meaning and I try to enjoy every moment. God fills my heart with so much love that I spend my days spilling it out wherever I go!

And I realize with great joy that this is all possible because of the original "bad" poker hand. Rich Mullen says in a line in His song called; "Hold me, Jesus;" "I would rather fight You for something I don't really want than take what You give that I need." I love this because reflecting back always leads to seeing the purpose in what I did not want or think I needed. The hand that I thought was "bad" when I was holding it turned out to be exactly what I needed. It is the suffering that brought me to this place of overwhelming love and joy!! It is the suffering that causes me to be so close to Jesus! He has been there with me; suffering with me!! He has taken me through it and I have given it back to Him with thanksgiving!! And in return, He has given me a "Royal Flush!"

Making Cream of Wheat

One of my husband's favorite things to eat for breakfast is Cream of Wheat. Cream of Wheat is a finely ground wheat cereal. I don't know if you have ever made it, but it is a real pain! It seems that my impatient nature can cause Cream of Wheat to become lumpy. So, I have perfected a tedious method to get it just right! Thirty seconds in the microwave over and over again with stirring in between each cooking time. For me, this seems like a prison sentence in front of the microwave! If I begin doing something else and forget to stir at the proper time, it will get lumpy! Ugh!!

Now, my husband knows this is not my favorite thing to cook, so he graciously does not ask for it if I offer to make breakfast. So, it takes a suggestion from me to start this tedious process. You might be asking yourself, why would she offer if she hates to make this? I believe with this gesture, I communicate love and sacrifice to my husband. It is an expression of love overriding my own preference. I believe this kind of action strengthens my marriage. If he was asking for it, then it would not be a gift from me. So we have an unsaid agreement. If I offer, I am giving him a gift and he really appreciates it.

This may seem small and insignificant, but these things add up to make a great marriage. It is also these small disciplines of dying to my own perferences which help me to become less selfish and more selfless. Ephesians 5:1-2 says; "Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children, and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God." Now what Jesus did on the cross for me can hardly be compared to making Cream of Wheat. But I believe by going through this routine about once a week, I am creating a habit of sacrificing for my husband. Then when the harder stuff comes, I have been through a bit of training. In order to live a life of love, I will have to make sacrifices, because love is an action word.

Making Cream of Wheat is good for me. If you know me much, you know I have had a lifelong struggle with my strong will. It is good for my flesh to do what it does not want to do! I have many systems in place in my life to deliberately take me out of my comfort zone and into uncomfortable circumstances. Most of these places are much rougher than making Cream of Wheat, but this spot in front of the microwave with spoon in hand is a great training ground. God calls us to "put the interest of others before ourselves." It is a good practice for me to step out of my own wants and desires and serve my husband and the other people God has put around me. So tomorrow morning when I would much rather flip pancakes which I find fun and satisfying, I will get up and offer my husband the breakfast of his dreams! Once again, I will make Cream of Wheat!

Too Much Ice Cream???

In my life on this earth, I would say I have had more than my share of ice cream! The possibilities seem endless and the satisfaction is soothing to my senses. Chocolate dipped in chocolate at Dairy Queen, Mint Chocolate Chip at Baskin Robbins, gelato on every corner in Italy, a Dark Chocolate Dove Bar everyday one summer, milkshakes after dinner every night, and even 12 ice cream sandwiches for dessert on a dare from my brother-in-law. These thoughts are beautiful in my mind and comforting in my memories. There is just something about ice cream! Truly, I love it!! What's not to love!!

Well, this love affair with ice cream went on from when I can remember until about ten days after my thirty sixth birthday! And then something terrible happened! I noticed my pants becoming tighter! And, with awe and shock, I saw a direct correlation between the tightness of my pants and the amounts of ice cream I was consuming! This was a shock and when I complained about these changes to the ones I love the most, they answered with a resounding; "Maybe you should not eat so much ice cream!" I promise you this was not the answer I wanted. I would have preferred to hear; "Maybe you could cut out the other food, but don't stop eating ice cream!"

This has been a ten-year struggle for me. Maybe some of you can relate. Sometimes the struggle gets under control, but other times it becomes ridiculous. I find it interesting how I can justify to myself in the strangest ways to eat some ice cream if I want it. Lately, I have been buying Skinny Cow Ice Cream Sandwiches. This is hilarious! Have you ever seen a skinny cow? I haven't. Because these are made to be lower in calories, I have a hard time only eating one at a time. I justify eating two or more because they are lower in fat and calories! I even ate two the other day at lunch time, telling myself they were "sandwiches" so it was ok. In Jeremiah 17:9, it says; "The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?" This really explained it all for me in the moments after I came out of the; "I want ice cream" fog and into reality! I actually laughed out loud at myself.

There is another scripture which came to mind from Romans 7:15 which says; "I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do, I do not do, but what I hate I do." Why do I hate this action I take? Because it causes me to feel uncomfortable with myself. I hate doing it, because I grow into a size I was not created to be. My heart deceives me into getting what I want in the moment, but I end up regretting it later. I end up saying to myself; "It was not worth it!!" I want to be wise and moderate and healthy! I want to feel good and be the best I can be!!

So today, I thank God for all of the years He gave me to eat as much ice cream as I wanted and see no effects! But today, I have to come to terms with the reality of my metabolism and practice the 9th fruit of the Spirit which is self-control. (Galatians 5:22) I don't know what it is for you, but I know as long as I am on earth I will struggle with my flesh. What I want is not always what is best for me! In all of these areas of struggle, I know Jesus is there for me to cry out to for comfort and self-control.

And He has gone ahead of me to prepare a place for me! (John 14:2) I bet in heaven, there are many more flavors of ice cream than I have ever tasted! Probably a endless variety of shops on every corner of the streets of gold. Until then I will cling tightly to Jesus and ask Him to help me to not eat too much ice cream!

A Good Investment!

In this time of economic uncertainty, I would not say any financial investment is a sure thing. Last week, I believe my husband found an investment I know will get a good return. We were out walking downtown on Friday night at the monthly Flagstaff Art Walk. This is an event where local businesses provide snacks and drinks in their establishments after regular hours and introduce local artists by displaying their artwork. We went into a store to see what they were showing this month, and we were immediately drawn to the oil paintings displayed on the walls. They were beautiful, intriguing, and of many different types. My favorite was an oil of a somewhat worn-out pair of red Converse high top sneakers.

We saw many friends that night. Gary and I split up talking and catching up with the crowd of locals and people visiting our mountain town. The atmosphere was friendly and filled with a great sense of joy. I talked to several people who I had not seen in years. It was fun and meaningful and a great way to spend a Friday night.

When it was time to go, Gary took me by the hand and strolled me over to meet the artist. To my shock, the artist of these great and many paintings was an 18-year old young man named Kory. I knew his name because I am a local soccer fan and have seen him play in games. He is a great soccer player, but the quality of his paintings was phenomenal. The insight and wisdom projected on the canvas was well beyond his years. I was impressed! He was friendly, outgoing, and filled with the hope of his future. It was a blessing to meet him.

When we left the store, Gary said, "I bought one of his paintings." I immediately said, "That is a GREAT investment." Why is this a great investment? We bought the first painting he has ever sold. By buying this painting, we communicated to him that we see the talent God has placed in him and we are willing to invest in his future. It was a confirmation to the artist to keep on painting. It is a joy for us to have this painting of red Converse sneakers in our home to remind us of God's incredible image and how He expresses it through the gifts and talents He puts in His people.

Hebrews 10:24 says; "And let us consider how to stimulate (motivate, spur, provoke, encourage, stir up) one another to love and good deeds." In this time of complete unrest and uncertainty in the world, people need to be motivated to do great things in whatever way God has created them. We can make a big difference by seeking the gifts and talents of people and encouraging them. The greatest investment of this generation (and all the others before and after us) is the investment in the lives of people. God can use the people He created to solve even the most terrifying issues we face in society today. He can use artists, teachers, pastors, mechanics, professional athletes, food servers, realtors, and all others to bring forth the message of His grace and mercy to this generation. His Name is Creator and He can give us creative ideas to inspire us to much needed changes in our city, our culture, and in the world! We can make a good investment in the lives of the people God puts us in contact with!! It's not to late to INVEST!

"Original Masterpiece"

Michael Jackson, Michael Jordan, Michangelo Buonarroti. Although they share similiar names, it is clear they are "Originals!" They found the gift of God created in them and developed these gifts to the point of spectacular! Whether you are a fan of "Thriller" or supernatural flying dunks or life-like marble sculptures, it is undeniable the extraordinary talent of these men.

I was reading a book called SoulPrint by Mark Batterson. He gave this analogy which led me to some research and thoughts I wanted to share. Michelangelo said about the David (a larger than life-sized marble sculture of King David); "I saw the angel in the marble and carved until I set him free." He could see the image in the rock and his role was to set it free! Now, I would say this is a unique gift and a very different perspective. If you have been to Florence, Italy, hopefully you had the chance to take in the David. I say "take in" because as I was viewing it, I believe it touched my soul. The David is the indescribable outcome of one man searching himself to find this great gift God created so then he could search into the marble to find the image of David.

In a hallway in the "Galleria dell Accademia" where the David dwells, are several pieces of Michelangelo's work called "Captives." These are partial scultures. Incomplete. Some really look like they are struggling to set themselves free from the rocks. The images in these rocks of the trapped men and women are very applicable to our spiritual walk here on earth.

In Isaiah 49:9 the Lord says; "I say to the captives, 'Come out,' and to those in darkness, 'Be free!'" Each day, I present my body, mind, soul, and spirit before the Lord so He can chisel away. I have a great fear of being trapped in darkness and not becoming all the Lord has created me to be. Maybe this comes from being born an identical twin. From this perspective, I can see the integral details even in the similiar. I spend much of my time helping others see their original qualities so they can live free!

I believe the greatest way to express the love of God and to reflect His image and glory is to be free. Free just to be me! It is a dangerous thing to put ourselves under the chisel of the wrong artist such as ourself, someone else, the pressures of culture, or public opinion, etc. This can lead to hypocrisy and lack of fulfillment. God forbid, we could end up being a cheap duplicate! God is the only artist capable of creating a human "Masterpiece." He has what it takes to free us from whatever rock is wrapped around us and holding us back. God has created us to be a "Masterpiece" unlike any other He has created. His imagination as an artist is as incomprehensible and vast as His image. Surrender into the hand of the First and Master artist! He will reveal in you His "Original Masterpiece!"

Romans 12:1; "Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in the view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God--this is your spiritual act of worship."

Love Never Fails!

It is 4:09 am and I am still awake. I was feeling very discouraged yesterday and it lasted until a few minutes ago. I have been wrestling for hours as to why this discouragement has been following me lately. It is so beautiful right now in Flagstaff!! Summer is my favorite time of year with its long days and beautiful colors!! I love being outside with my bare feet in the lush green grass!! My family is healthy and happy!! My precious baby is home for the summer!! So I struggled with this question for hours with no answer in spite of several attempts to distract myself.

This led me to pray a different prayer. I stopped asking; "Why?" and I started asking; "Lord, help me to be lifted out of this discouragement." And, of course, my perfect and gracious God did a miracle in my heart!! He gave me a revelation of something so exciting, I felt like a superhero jumping out of the deepest of pits. So I want to share it with you.

As I asked God to help me, I was reading through the scriptures and came to a very familiar passage. But in the familiar, I found a new and exciting revelation. I was reading my Amplified Bible (which is a version of the bible that includes Greek and Hebrew word definitions in the text). I was reading 1 Corinthians 13 which is usually referred to as the "Love" chapter. In verse 8, it says; "Love never fails..." and then defines this phrase with the words; "never fades out or becomes obsolete or comes to an end." This was very exciting to me!! I had never understood this to mean that love never fades away, becomes obsolete, or comes to an end!!

Later in the passage in verse 13, my Amplified Bible gave a beautiful definition of love. It defined love as being; "true affection for God and man, growing out of God's love for us and God's love in us." As I read this, I related so much to the statement. How many times have I been so aware of the extravagant way God loves me and seen it overflow to all who are around me. When I comprehend the way God loves me, it spills out all over the place!! Being filled with this kind of love gives me a true affection for God and man. Meditating on this concept makes me realize God's love in me gives me a true affection for people; even those who might be considered my enemies. This is supernatural!!

This new insight filled me with hope! My discouragement seems so far away!! Each day as I go through life letting the love of Jesus spill out with true affection, I am doing something that will never fade away. Each and every moment of love will never end. It will last forever and follow me and everyone else into eternity!! Though the gifts I have and the causes I support will be lost to this life on earth, no moment or act of love will ever be lost!! These actions are eternal!!

Think about this revelation. Think about how many times this true affection for God and man has happened in our lives!! Hugs, kisses, high-fives, acts of compassion, sacrifices made for others, and other moments like these are critical! They are never to be lost! Wow!! I am ready to face today with the joy of knowing I can create eternal moments by staying close to Jesus and allowing love to flow out of me!! It is awesome to live knowing; "Love Never Fails!!"

Impossible Is Nothing!!

Can you imagine the US Women's soccer team beating powerhouse Brazil after playing with only ten players for the last 55 minutes of the game? You can only imagine this if you believe what the Nike marketing team has pushed in their ad campaign---"Impossible is Nothing!!" As I watched this World Cup Quarterfinal game this morning, I witnessed that every American player believed this whole-heartedly!! After a 55 minute show of courage and determination by the US players, Abby Wombach, the 31 year old US veteran forward, scored the latest goal ever in World Cup history to tie the game and put it into penalty kicks!!

The amazing thing about this game was when all the odds were stacked against the US team, they did not give up!! They kept on fighting!! They played one player down because of a red card in the 66th minute. They were victim to several bad calls by the referee. But the confident attitude of the players was never broken! They just would not lose!! Even after two overtime periods and into the stoppage time, they kept the pressure coming until the job was done!!! What amazing heart!!!

I loved watching this game!! In fact, I stood for the last several minutes fervently praying for justice!!! Moments like these fuel my energy to fight in life when the odds are stacked against me!! God has created us to fight!! We are born to be warriors!! Ephesians 6:11 tell us to; "Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes." Why would we be encouraged to put on armor if we were not called to be warriors? Warriors in spirit!!

How do we battle? We battle in prayer!! We battle in faith!! We battle in action!! We battle in endurance, courage, and perseverence!! We overcome the obstacles however we can and with the help of God, we achieve the victory!! One of my favorite scriptures is found in Romans 12:21; "Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good."

When the US women took the field, they were not battling against evil but, at some point, they began to battle injustice. And as I watched, I saw them gain determination and play even harder. They did not waste time complaining. They continued fighting for the victory which they most certainly believed belonged to them. These moments make me proud to be an American!!

I will always remember this game as an example of how to fight! I don't only believe, but I know the victory belongs to me in Jesus. I know this because I am on the team of good. I am on the team of Jesus. No matter what comes at me in this world, I will believe for the victory!! 1 John 5:4 says; "For everyone who is born of God overcomes the world. And this is the victory that has overcome the world--our faith." The word victory in the greek is translated nike. I love it!! Nike means victory--"Impossible is Nothing!!"


Will we follow the example of the US women's soccer team and believe for the victory in the battles we fight in this world? Are we going to believe even when it looks impossible? Jesus has given us the victory--Nike!!! Let us remember, when all odds are against us... "Impossible is Nothing!!"

Accident????

On vacation in Lake Tahoe, we were leisurely on our way to dinner to enjoy the company of family, when all of a sudden there was a loud BANG and a sudden JOLT to our car. I turned around to check on the screaming coming from the back seat and was asked; "What happened?!?" Through the shock, I realized we had been involved in a car accident.

As I assessed the situation, it was clear I needed to call 911. My daughter, Sarah, had a large bump on the back of her head. She was crying in severe pain. I stepped outside to find the car that had hit us squished like an accordion. The horn was going off. People were filling the street to see if they could help. We found a trained emergency worker who stabilized my daughter's neck. Someone told me there were no passengers in the other car and the driver was ok. So we prayed and waited for the ambulance.

In the craziness of the situation, I asked myself; "What just happened?" We made a right turn after stopping at a three way stop. The other driver was looking into the setting sun and clearly did not see the stop sign. He came through at about 40 or 45 mph and slammed straight into the back of our car just as we began to accelerate after our turn. My body began to shake as I imagined what might have happened if we had been hit in the process of turning. Our car would have been t-boned. The injuries would have been much more serious!! Immediately, I thought of Psalm 91. It is a psalm of protection I often pray for my family. In verse 11, it says; "For He will command His angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways." In the middle of the chaos of this accident scene, I felt the peace of the protection of God. I looked at the back of our car to find only a few dents and a bumper in bad condition. We were clearly blessed and protected by God!!! It was so evident and I thanked Him as I prayed.

A few minutes later, as I was waiting outside of the ambulance to find out if Sarah needed to go to the hospital, Laura, my youngest daughter came and tapped my shoulder. She took me to the side and made me aware of the condition of the driver of the other vehicle. At this point, we had been told he was drunk. I looked over to see him sitting on a rock weeping. Laura said; "Mom, look at him. We need to let him know everything is ok." I recognized the compassion of Jesus in her eyes. Sarah had many people caring for her, but this young man was alone and suffering.

When we arrived at his side, I could see his tears and noticed he was mumbling the words; "I am sorry. I am so sorry..." I could not help but rub his shoulder and let him know we were not seriously injured and everything would be ok. Laura and I kept consoling him and I saw his deep pain and bondage.

I am sure this guy did not aspire to be a drunk driver who caused physical and emotional pain to others. He was in a desperate state!! He was hurting and we noticed and cared. Why? Jesus cares!!! If we read the gospels we see the compassion of Jesus both toward the innocent and the guilty.

Was this an accident? I believe it happened for a purpose. It made my family aware of a young man named Mark who is suffering. It is definitely supernatural love that causes me to pray for Mark and care about him as I have suffered personally with whiplash and have watched my family suffer because of his selfish and foolish actions. But, this kind of supernatural compassion is unavoidable when we see through the eys of Jesus.

It was a miracle when we got back into our car and drove off to continue our vacation and eat a nice dinner without a trip to the hospital. But, I am praying for a greater miracle. I pray this young man, Mark, will see God's love and realize his value and purpose in this world. I pray he will understand this was no accident!!!!

Running On Empty!

Don't you love the car manufacturers these days! They think of everything! Not only do we have a gauge showing us the level of our gas tank, but now we have a mode on the console telling us exactly how many miles until empty!! On top of that, I think the person who designed this device knows who I am. He decided to lie about when the car was at zero miles to save me the embarrassment and inconvenience of running out of gas. It is because of his consideration that I made it to the gas station the other day.

I had been driving for two days with the message "0 miles" posted on my dash before I rolled into the gas station. Later as I was reflecting, I was thinking what a perfect picture of my life this situation is. This is not the first time I have stared at the "0 miles" and then back at the road. I can testify that this kind of neglecting of the basics is stressful and tiring!! It was not just my car running on empty. I was personally running on empty too.

During these several days of over-commitment, I was feeling a certain scripture come to life in my spirit. This scripture is so dramatic it is somewhat humorous. It is found in Jonah 2:5. At this point, Jonah has been given a mission by God and decides to go in the opposite direction. Here is where he ends up. "The engulfing waters threatened me, the deep surrounded me; seaweed was wrapped around my head." This is a really bad situation but somehow I can never read it without chuckling. Just the image of seaweed wrapped around his head seems a bit physically funny to me. In verse seven, Jonah says, "When my life was slipping away, I remembered the Lord..." Now Jonah was recalling his journey to the bottom of the sea after the Lord had rescued him by causing a giant fish to swallow him. (You might like to get out your Bible and read the whole thing. I love it!!)

How can I relate to this scripture from the perspective of my dry office on the surface of the earth? My peace was gone! I might be dramatic to compare it to having seaweed wrapped around my head, but I can promise I was close. Think about this picture. Suffocating, disorienting, desperate, overwhelmed, panic strickened.... These are the feelings I feel when I lose control of my mouth and mind. Out of my mouth come the words; "Yes, Yes, Yes" when I have no idea how I will make the time to get it all done.

So, I asked the Lord a question; "Lord, how have I walked away from You, like Jonah?" Psalm 29:11 says; "The Lord gives strength to his people; the Lord blesses his people with peace." As I meditated on how I walked away, the answer snuck up on me. PRIDE had leaked into my heart. How did I know? I was looking at myself to be the answer to all of the need around me, instead of looking at Jesus! God has given me only so many hours, only so many gifts and talents. I thank Him for filling my life with other people who can help me take up the slack. So, today I humble myself before the Lord and receive the gifts He has sent to my life. He has surrounded me with people who love me and care!! I need to ask for some HELP!!

I Love Surprises!

One reason I love my relationship with Jesus so much is because I love surprises! I am amazed everyday at all the ways the Lord shows up in my life to assure me He is WITH me. He reminds me constantly that He really knows me! He understands me. And most of all, He made me the way I am and has the answer to all of my needs at every moment.

The other day, I was sitting in a sandwich shop waiting for my "to go" order. I had left my phone in the car so I could not use my down time to call or text someone. I was not carrying my purse, so I could not clean it out or write "to do" lists for later. There was nothing laying around to read. God knows I love to keep my mind engaged at all times. So, I decided to just relax and watch the big screen TV in front of me. When I looked up, I noticed there was a baseball game playing. I am a big sports fan, but find baseball a bit slow and boring to watch. Love to play it! For me, it is less than exciting to watch on TV. But, as you know, I had nothing else to do. So, I focused in and noticed I was watching a college game.

The first batter struck out. The batting team was behind by one run. The next batter stepped up and the most amazing thing happened. Right in the middle of the most boring ordinary moment came the supernatural power of God. I know one college baseball player in the country. He grew up with my daughters in Flagstaff!! Guess who was at bat?? This player I knew stepped up to the plate. After two strikes, He hit a base hit and earned an RBI to tie the game!! My boring moment was miraculously turned into exciting. And, I utterly enjoyed my five minute wait time watching this college baseball game.

I immediately knew I was having an encounter with God. He saw me in my boredom and impatience. He knew exactly what I needed to feel excited and alive at this moment!! So, He intervened right at the moment of my need. It was a small need and I had not even asked Him to help me. But, He was there to surprise me!! In Matthew 28:20, Jesus says; "... And be sure of this: I am WITH you ALWAYS, even to the end of the age."

I love this about my relationship with Jesus!! He is with me ALWAYS!! Even when I am not thinking about Him!! Even when I am not asking Him to meet my smallest and most insignificant need!! He is WITH me!! And He finds ways daily to remind me how important I am to Him and how loved I am!!! He is the only One who could have arranged for this five minutes to be the best it could have been for me. This is how my Father in heaven surprises me over and over!! After all, He knows I love surprises!!

Gaining Perspective!

I have a loved one who is suffering from short-term memory loss. Many people around her are terrified about what the future holds. They spend time talking about her memory getting worse and what might happen someday. I can understand this, but it seems they are missing out on the treasured times right in front of them.

When I have been around this person lately, I have seen a joy in her that is new and free. She doesn't worry as much as she once did, due to the fact that she can't remember. Her blood pressure has gone down. She is living more in the moment without being weighed down by the burdens of life. This experience has given me an opportunity to gain new perspective.

There is a particular verse in Matthew chapter six I love to quote. It seems to fit with many conversations! I have never found a person who disagreed with it, no matter what their religion or background! In verse 34, Jesus says; "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Can you relate? Can I get an "AMEN?!!!" I love the compassion of Jesus in telling us this. We can handle the trouble that comes today, but we are not to speculate on the trouble of tomorrow! This will only cause us to feel defeated and depressed! It is better to think the best of today, and not worry about tomorrow!!

Loss of short term memory has this effect on a person. When I watch my loved one, I see her get excited about the quail and bunnies in her back yard. Then a few minutes later, she is over-joyed again. Also, as she was facing surgery, she did not think of it until reminded. Therefore, she was not so stressed and concerned. She was enjoying life daily without the burden of worrying. It was like a form of rose-colored glasses.

I pray I will always choose to trust God with the things of tomorrow and enjoy the things of each day. I know in the day of trouble, He will be with me to navigate through!! So if I am accused of looking on the bright side, then I pray I will always be accused of this!! I don't want to take off my rose-colored glasses!! Everything is more beautiful through these lenses!

I pray we don't have to wait until we lose our short-term memory to eliminate worrying about tomorrow from our daily lives!! There is so much joy to take in!!

Philippians 4:8; "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things.

Fasting

Recently, I participated with a group of people in a fast for 21 days. We were fasting together with the purpose of bringing God's presence into a particular neighborhood in our city. This was the longest fast I had ever done. Many of us followed the Daniel fast spoken of in Daniel 1 and Daniel 10:1. In Daniel 1, Daniel asks the official if he and his friends can be given only vegetables to eat and water to drink. The official agreed for 10 days and then checked their appearance thinking that they would look worse than the other men. When he checked them, they looked healthier and better nourished than the rest.

I am bringing this up because a strange thing kept happening as I was fasting. People kept commenting on the clearness of my eyes and the glowing nature of my skin. Many people who did not know I was fasting wanted to know why they could see a physical difference in me. It was very encouraging to know that God had given me a physical effect!

Jesus says in Matthew 6:16; "When you fast..." Notice He does not say IF you fast, but He says WHEN you fast. This shows me that fasting is not an optional thing. It is part of my existence while we are here on earth. I know we go to at least one banquet in heaven, but I am hoping heaven is full of all the food we love except without the calories or maybe the effect of calories here on earth:)

So, when is the proper time to fast? I can't answer this for you, but I can tell you what causes me to consider fasting. When I see a stronghold in my life. A stronghold means "a fortified place or a fortress." This is a really strong place that is tough to breakthrough. When I have been praying for a long time and don't see breakthrough, I fast. When my heart is very burdened with a situation, I fast. Sometimes when I feel very burdened, I start fasting without thinking about it, because I am so burdened I don't feel like eating. Othertimes, I begin a fast to bring my heart to a desperate place so I can pray in a focused and desperate way. Not eating much and especially not eating ice cream and enchiladas reminds me often during the day to focus on praying.

Some people eat to live, but I am a person who lives to eat! During this long period of fasting, I became desperate and focused in my prayer. Many breakthroughs occurred. Both personally and in the neighborhood we prayed for. God showed us He was present and did miracles in the lives of people. He transformed the neighborhood and He also transformed my heart. I can truly say, I will never be the same. So, if you have not tried fasting, start today. You can give up a meal and pray. Or maybe the radio in your car for a week. How about the computer games that eat up so much time. Pick something that is hard for you. I picked food because that is hard for me. And then ask God to show you something to pray for and watch for the miracle!!!

Strong and Courageous

My husband and I were in the car taking our grandsons out for pizza. We began to have a heated discussion when all of a sudden I heard the loud, deep, raspy voice of my three year old grandson. He said; "Grandma, I appreciate you. I love you. Grandpa, you should appreciate grandma!" Where does this boy get his vocabulary? He just turned three on April 29th. Not only did he use the word, but it was clear that he understood what he was talking about. It was precious!

Gary responded by saying; "Jayden, I appreciate grandma. I am sorry that we were arguing." By this time, I had forgoten what we were arguing about. I felt convicted because I was sure it was my grumpy mood that had caused the argument. So I wondered why Jayden had taken my side?

It seemed he just naturally came to my rescue because I am a woman. He felt the responsibility as a little man to stick up for me whom he deemed as the underdog. He is definitely the "super hero" type. He spends his time with me carrying around a sponge sword play fighting to save me from pretend "bad guys." He tells me as he is playing; "Don't worry grandma, I will save you!" He was born with this strong and courageous quality.

In the first chapter of Joshua after Moses dies when God is commissioning Joshua as the leader of Israel, He commands Joshua several times; "Be strong and courageous." Courage and strength are qualities of leadership. And leadership starts in the home and in the heart.

Since I have noticed this God given quality of leadership in my grandson, I can pray for his life more specifically. No matter what I see in the physical realm as he goes through the years, I will pray and believe God for this promise shown to me today.

At three, it is impossible for Jayden to be socialized into being someone that he is not. I have seen this truth as I have raised my daughters. When they went through their teenage years and picked up qualities that were not true to themselves, I continued to pray for the promises God had shown me in their innocent years. And I continued to pray and believe God for the people He had created them to be. I know they are healthy and truly themselves when they exhibit the gifts they could not help expressing before they learned how to filter themselves.

So now I will believe God for this little bold leader who has been given to our family. I will remind him over the years of who he is. I will encourage him to be true to who he was created to be. And I will enjoy the valiance and honor that comes so naturally to him. I will pray and believe God through the rough years until I see a healthy young man with these amazing qualities. God has given me a healthy glimpse of the Jayden he created. I will stand by and encourage him to be the amazing man he was created to be. God has given me this commission.

Oneness

This morning when I was beginning to wake up, I heard the sound of a heartbeat. As I began to gain consciousness, I realized that my ear was squished under my husband's arm. This caused a sort of "echo" sounding heartbeat. As I listened to the sound of the heartbeat, I was not sure if I was hearing Gary's or mine. This got me thinking about oneness.

In Genesis 2:24, God says; "Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh." On Monday, I will be married for 24 years. In this moment I was thinking; "Where does Gary end and where do I begin?" Our lives are so wrapped up together. We have three beautiful daughter, two amazing grandsons, and a wonderful new son-in-law. My past, present, and future are full of thoughts of us together. We know eachother so well it sometimes causes arguments?!? I have learned to love the things he loves, such as golf, and he has learned to cry with me at what he calls "girlie" movies, and so on. His dreams are my dreams and mine are his. We are ONE!!! It would be impossible to separate our lives apart from death!!

Over the years, I have found marriage to be the most amazing part of life on earth and at the same time, the hardest part. It has caused me to face my own selfishness and pride more than anything else. Closeness is beautiful, but it also very revealing. My marriage has made me better by revealing the worst in me which has caused me to cry out to Jesus to help me to change. I have become more like Christ. I have learned to love more deeply, to extend more mercy, and to show more grace. I have also experienced the greatest joy life has to offer with my husband. I am a better version of myself!!

As I reflected on these thoughts and continued to listen to the sound of the heartbeat, I began to think; "Maybe this is the the sound of OUR heartbeat together." His life wrapped up in mine, and my life wrapped up in his. I am so grateful to God for this man!!! I love this oneness God has created!! And I especially love my husband!!

I think Rod Stewart describes oneness very well in a verse from his song; "You're In My Heart." It goes like this, "You're in my heart; you're in my soul. You'll be my breath should I grow old. You are my lover; you're my best friend. You're in my soul."

Springtime

I love the springtime. We get it a bit late in Flagstaff, but today it had so clearly arrived. The birds were out singing their songs, many trees were filled with pretty pink blossoms, and the grass was that light green color of the first shoots of spring. My heart was warm all day as I felt the joy and excitement of the new life all around me.

Tonight, I was at a banquet for the New Horizons Teen Challenge Academy in Flagstaff. This Academy houses teenage young men who have addictions. One of the young men spoke at the banquet about his additions to alcohol and all kind of drugs. At one point, he shared; "I was so desperate to find joy. I was empty inside and lost. I was taking drugs because I could not find joy and satisfaction. And the drugs only worked for a little while..."

When he was speaking, I felt a distant tinge of recognition in my soul. And to my surprise, I remembered feeling this way. Worthless, meaningless, empty, lost, without hope. Why was it a surprise? Because this feeling that was at one point so familiar to me was now very unfamiliar. So, I began to ask the Lord; "What is in my soul right now?" And His answer to me was; "Springtime." Psalm 16:11 says; "You have made known to me the path of life; You will fill me with joy in your presence..." This is what is in my soul right now! The joy of having God's presence with me at all times. My path is FULL of life and joy and excitement!!

One of my favorite verses is found in Romans 6:4; "...And just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life." This young man from New Horizons went on to tell us about how God had spoken to Him eight months ago. He boasted of the love and hope that Jesus had put in his heart! He expressed the joy and satisfaction that had filled him completely. He assured us that he would never be taking drugs again because he trusted the Lord to keep him busy helping other people. He shared with us his NEW life!

I love the springtime of Jesus in my heart. The new life I experienced so many years ago is still new and fresh everyday. This is a perpetual springtime. Life filling me up to overflowing!! Joy so full and in my heart even in the hardest moments!! It is truly indescribable!! The best way to understand it is to look around and take in the creation as it springs forth with life and joy and excitement all around us!! Springtime!!

A Smile Can Change Everything!

The other day, I was coming out of my local grocery store pushing my cart filled with groceries. I was deep in thought and felt overwhelmed by the circumstances surrounding my life. I felt like no matter what effort I put in, things were just not turning out the way I had hoped for. As I took a few steps out of the door, I realized that I was parked on the downhill side of the parking lot. Usually, at this moment, I would feel the urge to give my cart a push and jump with both feet up onto the cart and take whatever wild ride it would give me. But, not on this day.

As I continued walking, I decided to take the ride even if I did not feel like it. Maybe it would lift my mood and lighten up my heart. So I proceeded and realized in the middle of the ride, I was smiling. It is funny how smiling can change everything. In Proverbs 31, it describes the characteristics of an amazing woman. Verse 25 says; "...she smiles at the future." This word smiles in Hebrew means; to laugh, to play, to rejoice, to amuse. Although my day had not started out great, this action of riding the cart changed my attitude. It caused me to gain perspective by shifting my thoughts to something I loved. I don't know why I love to ride grocery carts, but it is part of who God created me to be. I have loved these rides since childhood and the amusement has not worn off.

As my ride came to an end, I opened up my car and began to unload my groceries. A young man who was collecting the carts came up behind me and said, "Not enough people do that." As I turned every shade of red, I asked him in a quiet voice, "What did you say?" And he came a little closer and with all sincerity, he answered, "Not enough people ride the carts." I smiled at him and saw that I had also lifted his spirits and added a little joy to his day. He took my empty cart and he walked away with a skip in his step. As I reflected on this encounter, I realize he had observed my joy. He could have said, "Not enough people have joy." At this moment, my mind was flooded with all of the opportunities around me. With each step into life, I have endless opportunities to make myself smile and help those around me smile too!

What is it that you love to do? Paint a picture, play a guitar, skip, jump, dance, sing a song, swim, ride an elevator, run up the down side of an escalator? I don't know what does it for you, but I do know when we do some things, we can't help but smile! Many times in life, we cannot change the circumstances around us, but we can embrace the things God has given us. We are surrounded with opportunities to find joy. In Nehemiah 8:10, it says; "...the joy of the Lord is our strength." If you are feeling down today, as I was the other day, what can you do that will make you enjoy this day? No matter how bad things look and feel, we are always in reach of a moment of joy that could lead to a smile! And, a smile can change everything!

Heavenly Moments

Recently, I was looking over some pictures from my daughter's wedding which took place last summer. I ran across a picture of a time at the end of the wedding where everyone in the room had a smile on their face. We were preparing for the bride and groom to leave for their honeymoon. Some of the kids had handed out bubbles for everyone to blow as the bride and groom walked through a tunnel of guests to their awaiting limo. But that is not what happened.

The music was playing and the dance floor was filled with guests and everyone began to blow bubbles. The room was filled with a sort of magical feeling as everyone smiled and quietly got lost in blowing bubbles. When my daughter and her new husband came out to leave, they joined in the bubble blowing fun. It was one of those times that could not have been planned, but just spontaneously happened. It was beautiful! The room filled with floating bubbles. It felt like all thinking had stopped as we surrendered to this moment of renewed youth, love, and pure enjoyment. This moment stretched out to forever.

I believe this is how heaven will be. No deadlines. No rushing. Nothing pressing to worry about. Simple enjoyment! Appreciating the moments, loving the people, taking in our surroundings with all of our senses; just being. And all of this in the pressence of God! Amazing! It states in Revelation 21:4; "He will wipe away every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain. All these things are gone forever." Hallelujah!!

I know it blessed God that day when we all got lost in the bubble blowing moment. We threw out the schedule and the plan. We filled the room with love and wonder. We gave in to our childlike, carefree nature. We trusted and did not think seriously about anything. We were all together BEING in the moment. I believe we worship God when we can truly surrender to BEING in the moment. He is the Creator of the time that we live in. He is the author for these heavenly moments. His presence is with us and He is enjoying our childlike freedom!

I love the story of King David coming into the city of Jerusalem with the ark of God. It was a moment that he had waited for. In David's day, the ark of God was the place where God's presence dwelled. He had tried to bring the ark into Jerusalem at another time and it had not worked out. So, when the ark came into the city, he rejoiced. It says that he was dancing and celebrating in 1 Chronicles 15:29. David's life was filled with many tough decisions. He had experienced much pain and sorrow in his lifetime and he would experiece more after this moment. But, he put all of his cares aside and he surrendered to the freedom of dancing in the streets. He gave in to the joy in his heart and let it out!

I pray as we go through life, we look for and give into these times of pure enjoyment! God gives us the privilege of calling Him; "Abba, Father." This word translated is; "Daddy." (Galatians 4:6) When I relate to God as my Daddy, I can live in a childlike place knowing that He is looking out for me and taking care of everything. This gives me the freedom to take the time to blow more bubbles and find more of these heavenly moments!

When God says "No!"

Last Monday morning, my phone began to ring off the hook. I was in the process of planning a barbeque and carnival for 500 people. Many of my volunteers, such as; the band, the train owner, the bounce house owner, etc. were calling to ask if we should cancel the event. They had watched the weather report and we had a 70% chance of snow for the day of our event. My answer to each one was; "I don't even want to talk about this until we all ask the Lord to change the weather!"

So, ask I did! I spent every moment I had asking the Lord for this miracle. Why did I ask Him? Because He can change the weather. Because He was my only hope in changing the weather. Because I wanted a sunny day! I am sure most of us are familiar with the story in Matthew 8 where Jesus calms the storm on the lake when the disciples think they are going to perish. Verse 27 says; "The men were amazed and asked, 'What kind of man is this? Even the winds and the waves obey Him!'" This is the God that I know today! He has changed the weather before in my life. In fact, there was a 70% chance of rain on my daughter's wedding day this summer and we did not see a drop!!! I have asked for practically everything from God and have seen so many amazing miracles!! So, I kept asking the One who could help me!

There is something exciting to me about waiting on God in a circumstance that is impossible without Him. This week, I often thought of the movie; "Braveheart." In one scene, the main character, William Wallace, is leading an army into battle. The opposing army is charging at their line and he is yelling; "Hold, hold, hold!!" The men are looking at him anxiously but with trust and respect waiting for his signal. This was how I felt! I was holding and waiting on my leader, Jesus, to give me my orders. When I was sure about the snow, then I would act based on the answer that God was giving me. Until then, I would believe in God's ability knowing who He is and trusting His judgement as to the outcome of the day. This is the kind of excitement I feel when I am waiting in prayer on the Lord.

On the early morning of our event, I woke up at 3:23am. I got up and looked outside and there was no snow. I thought God was going to answer my prayer for a sunny day! But, just as my hopes were high, I saw the snow begin to fall. And it was falling hard!! At this moment, I had two choices: I could act like a three year old and ask the notorious question; "WHY?" or I could trust God with His answer which I knew at this point was; "No!" I chose to trust God to make this event a success in spite of the snow.

We served over 325 people that day. We treated many kids to carnival events, such as; face painting, fishing for toys, etc. We gave away prizes! I can say for sure that we lavished the love of Jesus on all that came!! We had the best indoor carnival and barbeque possible and our cooks stood out in the snow grilling the chicken and tri-tip for 5 hours. It was not what I imagined, but it was fun!! And all of the volunteers showed up with great attitudes!! We were in it together and we had a victory!!

I don't know why the Lord did not change the weather on this day. But, I do know that He could have!! I ask God all the time for things that only He can do. I believe that it blesses Him when we have faith in who He is and we know that He can do anything we ask of Him. I also believe that it blesses Him when we can take; "No!" for an answer. How do we do this graciously? We remember that He is God and we are not. And we receive His; "No!" as the BEST answer even when we don't understand. After all, His perspective is so much greater than our own!! So, we trust Him!!

Hebrews 11:6; "And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to Him must believe that He exists and that He rewards those who earnestly seek Him."

We Are Not Rejected!!!

Rejection is a feeling that I am very familiar with. It is one of my greatest fears and it is impossible to avoid. At this point in my life, I do not make decisions based on whether I will be rejected or not, because I do not let fear control me. But, it still hurts when I feel rejected.

As I was thinking about this topic, I was pondering where feelings of rejection come from. As I began to think over my life, I could see many of the circumstances of my life set me up for much rejection. When I was young enough to comprehend that I did not have a father, I felt rejection. As a youth, I realized that people did not accept me because I was "illegitimate" which caused feelings of rejection. Then as I grew older, I made choices that caused people to reject me. I even rejected myself because I saw that some of my choices hurt me and the people around me. My mind was set up to look for possible rejection and try to avoid it with my actions. This is a tiring and impossible way to live.

During these years, I worked very hard to counteract rejection by doing well in school, excelling in athletics, and any other thing I could find acceptable in this world. It was not until I was 27 that I realized that I was driven by the fear of rejection. I remember walking through my bedroom with a basket of laundry on a routine day. All of a sudden, I fell to the ground and the laundry went flying; I landed face down in tears and cried out to God saying; "Lord, no matter what I do, I am not acceptable." All of the years of this futile battle had caught up to me. I was ready to surrender!!

Fortunately, I surrendered to the right person. His name is Jesus! He has never rejected me and He never will. At this moment, I began to rely on His love and acceptance. This journey has led to a life of freedom. It is easier and more fun to live knowing each moment I am loved and accepted even on my worst days. My bad actions cannot change the love that God has for me.

I love the story in Luke 19 of Zacchaeus. He was a tax collector in Jericho. When Jesus entered the city, Zacchaeus climbed up into a tree to see Jesus. He did it because he was of "short stature." I can understand this, because I am short too. I have been in many crowds where all I can see is the back of people's heads. In all these years, I have never climbed into a tree to see something. This shows how desperately Zacchaeus wanted to see Jesus. And Jesus notices and cares when we are desperate. In verse 5, Jesus says; "Zacchaeus, hurry and come down, for today I must stay at your house."

Here is how the people around respond; "...they all complained saying, 'He has gone to be a guest with a man who is a sinner.'" Jesus was breaking all customs of the religious leaders. They would not eat with a sinner and especially not stay at his house. If you read the next few verses in this passage, you see that the people were right about Zacchaeus... he was a corrupt tax collector. So, he tells Jesus he is giving half of his goods to the poor and if he has taken anything from anyone, he is going to restore it fourfold. Zacchaeus, a sinner, came in contact with the true loving and accepting nature of God. It is the love of Jesus and His acceptance that helps Zacchaeus get set free from his greedy and corrupt ways. You can see that Jesus loved and accepted Zacchaeus BEFORE he changed.

If you are feeling rejected today, I want you to know that you are loved, accepted, and desired by God right now. He is not waiting for you to change your ways. He is not asking you to get your act together. He just wants you the way you are right now. I love knowing this truth each day. He wants me even when it feels like no one else does. We are not rejected!!!

Revelation 3:20- "Behold I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and dine with him, and he with Me."

The Adventure I Seek

A few weeks ago, I received a call from a friend. She asked me to pray for a little boy who was 18 months old and had contracted a virus that left him with a 2% chance of living. When I hung up the phone, I contemplated this circumstance. This particular friend had sometimes mocked my relationship with Jesus. She had made comments about the close-mindedness of Christianity and our lack of tolerance. Yet when she had no hope and was facing a circumstance that was outside the realm of what her mind could see as possible, she called me. She said that she knew that I had a "connection" with God and asked me to pray. She knew that I believed in a God who could do this. A God that in the face of very slim chances, could defy what was probable and bring a victory. I assured her that I would pray and thanked her for thinking of Jesus.

The blessing of my friend's call reminded me of a story in 1 Samuel 14. King Saul and an army of 600 men were facing a battle with the Philistines. They were out-numbered and Saul was trying to figure out what they should do. Meanwhile, his son, Jonathan, takes his armour-bearer and goes to the Philistine garrison. Here is what Jonathan says to his armour-bearer in verse 6; "Come, let us go over to the garrison of these uncircumcised; it may be that the Lord will work for us. For nothing restrains the Lord from saving by many or by few." The most incredible part of this story is the reaction of his armour-bearer. You might think that he would have said; "Are you crazy. We don't have a chance." Here is how he responds in verse 7; "Do all that is in your heart. Go then; here I am with you, according to your heart."

I love this! The only possibility for victory was for God to come through. Jonathan said to his friend; "it MAY BE that the Lord will work for us." His friend whole-heartedly agreed and said these words that I love so much; "... here I am WITH you, according to your heart." This is where I find the adventure in my life. This is when I feel the excitement that Jonathan and his friend must have felt that day preparing to climb up the steep slope on their hands and knees facing sure defeat without God, but the best kind of victory with Him. I love to be a part of the victory that is impossible without God!!! This is what makes my heart beat fast and my spirit soar!! When the circumstances and everyone around say; "This is not possible." and when I (and those that are WITH me) can say back; "Oh yes it is with God!" What Jonathan understood was that God was with them. He mentions the word uncircumcised in verse 6. Circumcision was a sign of the covenant that God had with Israel. It was a sign that they were His people and He was their God. Jonathan used this word to remind himself and his friend that God was WITH them. When I live in the realization that in this generation I have a covenant with God and He is WITH me, I know that nothing is impossible!!

Many years ago when I was first made aware of the supernatural power of God and how He wanted me to participate through prayer and action in His miracles on this earth, I prayed a prayer that I have not stopped praying. "Lord, I pray that You will show me so many miracles that I will never have to repeat the same story of Your power over and over. I pray that you will give me new and fresh miracles day by day and I promise to tell of Your wonders and power in this generation!" God has answered this prayer and I have lived in the adventure of Him ever since. I have seen so many miracles and have been on the front lines joining Him as He has done so many supernatural things. I love this adventure!! The adventure of trusting Jesus with everything and having hope and expectancy in all circumstances! I am not trusting in me or my prayers. I am trusting in "Him who is able to do immeasurably more than we can ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within US." Ephesians 3:20.

My friend was right!! She came to the right place for victory in the life of this baby boy. She came to Jesus!! And He answered her prayers!! This little boy survived his virus when almost no one thought he would. And my friend was able to see "the goodness of God in the land of the living..." Psalm 27:13. The beginning of her faith was established as she saw the power of God. I am so blessed that I participated through prayer in this miracle both in this baby's body and my friend's heart!!

I promise you that you will not find me jumping out of an airplane with a parachute or jumping off a bridge with a bungy-cord straped on my ankle or at the summit of Mt Everest. But, I will spend my life on the front lines with Jesus! You will find me standing with Jesus as He brings His victory on this earth!!! This is the adventure I seek!!