A close friend of mine said something to me which has been resonating in my soul. What she said was brave and wise and like nothing anyone has ever said in my life. She said; "I am sorry about the things you have been through in your life. But, I am glad you have been through them. In going through those things, God has made you into the woman you are. And, I love who you are so I would not want the suffering in your life to be taken away."
In my life I have been acquainted with suffering. If God called out from heaven; "My children, would one of you be willing to please go through ______ ?," I am sure I would not have volunteered and I don't think you would have either. I am sure there are many things in your life you would not have chosen to suffer through. I believe I have come to terms with the things I have suffered. I know I have suffered more than some people and less than others. In pondering this and living life, one thing I do know is WE ALL suffer.
The Bible is clear about Jesus being a man of suffering. Isaiah says in Chapter 53, verse 3 as he is prophesying about Jesus; "He was despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows and familiar with suffering." In His life on earth, Jesus was spit upon, beaten, striped, insulted, disrespected, disbelieved, and even crucified. I think the greatest suffering might have been God coming in the form of a man, Jesus! All the power to "spread the universe with His right arm" and He held back His power to give us all a choice to believe. And many He created with His own hands, did not believe. John 11:35 says; "Jesus wept."
James 1:2-4 says; "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know the testing of your faith develops perserverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." Also, Romans 5:3-4 says; "...we rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope." Although I have come to terms with my past sufferings, I still lack in rejoicing when trials come. So, how do I help myself rejoice in the time of suffering knowing that the outcome of my sufferings have brought great things into my life?
I think about a poker game. In poker you get 5 cards. I believe when I was born, I got one ace, let's say, the ace of hearts. The rest of my hand was a mess of cards that I did not want or need. So I lived with that hand for awhile until it was my turn to discard to the dealer. I threw 4 cards back in. Now this poker game was not a game of luck, because Jesus was the dealer. He knew that if He added another good card to my original hand, I would have only discarded three cards and it would have messed up the final outcome. So those 4 cards that I thought I did not need, well, I needed them for the final outcome. In the game of life, I have been dealt a "Royal Flush", ace of hearts high. This is the highest hand in the game of poker.
God has surrounded my life with the most beautiful people! I am convinced that my family and friends are the most loving and wonderful people on the earth!! Also, I am absolutely sure at each moment, even in my worst ones, that God loves me!! I feel Him watching me, enjoying me, and sharing life with me!! This love He gives is not related to my mistakes or my great accomplishments. He is just always there, loving me!! I am appreciated and loved by friends and family for who I am and everything I have gone through!! They love me even in my imperfect and unfinished state! Each day I wake up with purpose and meaning and I try to enjoy every moment. God fills my heart with so much love that I spend my days spilling it out wherever I go!
And I realize with great joy that this is all possible because of the original "bad" poker hand. Rich Mullen says in a line in His song called; "Hold me, Jesus;" "I would rather fight You for something I don't really want than take what You give that I need." I love this because reflecting back always leads to seeing the purpose in what I did not want or think I needed. The hand that I thought was "bad" when I was holding it turned out to be exactly what I needed. It is the suffering that brought me to this place of overwhelming love and joy!! It is the suffering that causes me to be so close to Jesus! He has been there with me; suffering with me!! He has taken me through it and I have given it back to Him with thanksgiving!! And in return, He has given me a "Royal Flush!"
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